Searching for the writing on the wall . . . photo-heart connection, number 3

"Searching for the writing on the wall"

I've typed, deleted, typed some more and deleted again. 

I just can't quite put what I'm thinking, feeling, into the right words.

As a parent, the moment your child is born you do the best you can to protect them all the while preparing them for life away from the nest. Keeping them under your protective wing as they learn to fly, giving them a soft landing when they fall. But try as we may, there is just no way to protect them from everything. Some things are just not in our control. 

 I've mentioned a few times here that my son has been really sick. Fever, weakness, extreme fatigue, body aches and joint pains. Not the flu, or a sinus infection, or a recurrence of bronchitis. But the kind of sick when you know something is just not right. 

On Monday we had our second set of blood work done, and on Tuesday night the doctor called and was quite concerned about the inflammation marker that was 30 times what it should be. And the next thing out of her mouth was, "I need you to go straight to the ER at Texas Children's Hospital, they are expecting you." Wait did she just say ER?  And not only were they expecting us, but they took us over an entire lobby of waiting people . . . where a few short hours later we would be admitted and on the 15th floor complete with our own "team yellow" set of doctors.

The thing is about this inflammation marker, is that it only tells you that you have inflammation, it just doesn't tell you why. And unfortunately his symptoms fell into a slush bowl of things it could be. When they don't point to a specific path it then becomes a process of elimination, one slow thing after another. We are now home, still without any definitive answers, but our path and direction has been narrowed to Rheumatology. 

 You're probably wondering what this photo has to do with a heart connection. Well, this was the photo I was working on for photo art Friday (prompt being graffiti) on Tuesday and finished literally minutes before the doctor called. And after this week I wasn't even thinking about a blog post, but because I had already done this photo I thought I would just go ahead and share it. But when I looked at it again, it spoke to me in a completely different way, I saw it immediately. Trains and tracks became the narrowing of answers, and the brick wall texture I added became the uncertainty of a diagnosis. The graffiti on the train is illegible and there is no writing on the wall as to what this will all mean in the future. 

All I know is that I have an almost 16 year old boy, an incredible young man, student and athlete, that has been stopped in his tracks. Who struggles right now to pop open a can of soda, or to unscrew the lid on the Gatorade,  who is fatigued just walking up the stairs. 

It's so hard to watch,

 and completely breaks my heart.

Proverbs 3:5-6  Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding;

in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.

Next week we have a follow up with the Rheumatologist, hopefully with some completed blood

tests and a little closer to an answer.

Until then, I wish you a blessed Easter weekend,

Love, Kim

XO

Some of you already knew this, and I can't thank you enough for your prayers and concerns!! 

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Finding Serendipity {1440}

Flower power . . .

"Flowers really do intoxicate me."

-Vita Sackville-West

Yep, I guess you could call me drunk on their fragrance.

Smitten, overjoyed, and captivated by their beauty.

I don't just see them with my eyes as

they speak volumes to my heart even in complete silence.

I think flowers and people have a lot in common, don't ya think?

Both come in different colors, shapes and sizes and each have their own personalities.

Some are more bold while others tend to be softer, like a whisper. 

There are ones that are playful and mysterious, whiles others may be a little more elegant or exotic.

But whether a flower or a person, each has its own beauty and in both that beauty lies behind the layers.

We don't judge a flower before it's had a chance to open.

Well, I'm pretty sure we don't really judge them at all . . . and we shouldn't do that with people either.

Flowers seem to be the only thing I'm able to click with my camera lately, as my son is still home and still really sick. And even though I adore tulips, I'm hoping my grocery store gets something a bit more exciting in. I've been checking and waiting with baited breath for some Ranunculus to come in but with no luck so far!! I guess I could just do a study of Tulips in every color, lol!

Larkspur - {Kim Klassen Isobel and Kirstin}

 {Nancy Claeys Organic Paper}

{Kim Klassen Karla and Kirstin and Love that Shot Calais}

I hope you are having a wonderful day, and if you are one of the lucky ones (NOT) that just got more snow, I hope it melts really soon. Our temps have fallen from the mid seventies to the low fifties and it's so windy I can't even take my flowers outside to the porch to photograph. In fact I brought my caterpillars inside too!

Yes, I have some Monarch babies, 2 chrysalis and one caterpillar getting fatter by the day.

Until next time,

Love, Kim

XO

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Tuesdays Around the World

A self-portrait . . .

"Photography deals exquisitely with appearances, but nothing is what it appears to be."

- Duane Michals

It's said that a picture is worth a thousand words, but as a photograph can tell a lot of truths, it can also tells us many lies, deceiving at the very least. We choose what to include and more importantly what to exclude. Being behind the camera we simply get to decide what it is we are trying to say and how we are trying to say it.

But what if you are both the photographer and the subject?

For some it seems to be like second nature, as casual as putting on your shoes.

For me it's anything but. It's uncomfortable, scary. I break into a sweat at just the thought of someone snapping my photo. But at least when I'm the one taking it I can be in control of the truths lies.

Today for Photo Art Friday our prompt is self-portraiture. And as one who already breaks a sweat from far too many hot flashes I'm glad I had this one in the archives. Well, that and I have had a really sick boy home all week which has made getting extra things done a wee bit more difficult.

I took this one a year ago January when the sun was flooding into my bathroom mirror, which is always good for telling lies about wrinkles and age spots. The pink highlights, those are real. Oh and I really do have two brown eyes. The rest of the photo was really boring, just the bathroom wall and a doorway. So I started with Bonnie's texture called Drips of rainbow in overlay, her Simply the Best texture in screen, and then added some fake bokeh. 

The water drop texture represents the hot flashes and tears that come from menopause. The writing which is French, represents the feeling I get sometimes when I look in the mirror. You know that foreign feeling of who the heck is this older looking person looking back at me kinda feeling.

So there you have it, a photo that is nothing like what it appears to be. But it is a little fun, I cannot lie, to partake in the art of deception when it comes to my age!

Hopefully, I will be back on my regular blogging track next week. I know I've missed a lot of your posts while I've been gone, but this is the first time in almost a week that I've been able to spend a minute at the computer. I do have some fun stuff to share with you though.....

Until then . . . 

Love, Kim

XO

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Friday Photo Journal, Finding Serendipity {1440}

Short and sweet today . . .

"Every person is like a single tulip. 

While they may blend when together, each one is special in its own light."

- Daniella Kessler

Well, sometimes it's really good to be behind . . . I had wanted to share something else today, since it's anything goes for texture Tuesday, but as per usual I didn't get around to finishing it for today. But that's okay, because I think it will fit into "wise words" for next next, lucky me.  Of course in my defense, I wasn't home all weekend And on Saturday we had a whirlwind day driving to the A&M campus and then to the UT campus so my daughter could better make her final decision as to what she will do next year. A twelve hour day, eight of it driving in the car, whew! She was accepted to every school she applied at except for the one she really wanted to go to, Murphy's law! But there is always a plan B to get to where you want to be. She will go to UT San Antonio and do their CAP program and transfer to UT the next year, unless she decides she wants to stay at UTSA. 

I'm not ready for this... 

I'm not ready for this...

I'm not ready for this . . . 

The End.

Love, Kim

XO

P.S.- It's spring break and although we aren't going anywhere . . . it's spring break . . . so if you don't see me here on Thursday, I will be back next week!

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Tuesday Muse

A Bee-autiful world . . .

"Pollinators are what ecologists call keystone species.

You know how an arch has a keystone.

It's the one stone that keeps the two halves of the arch

together {...} If you remove the keystone, the whole arch collapses."

~ May Berenbaum, PhD, Entomologist 


It's not exactly a secret that I have a thing for insects. I can't explain it really, and I know a lot of people don't share that affinity with me. But, if I at least peak your interest I'll have done what I set out to do.

One of the many things I love about spring, besides that beautiful shade of green that starts showing up in the trees and the bushes and in the grass and the new little seedlings sprouting from the ground, is what follows right behind it . . . the honey bee. Such an incredible little aerodynamically built creature.

As the temperatures have become warmer, and the nurseries are stocking up with their favorite flowers I'm seeing more and more of them. It's been a bit difficult to photograph them though as it's been horribly windy here, but these guys are a bit tricky anyway just because they are always on the move. Double whammy! 

{Rosemary}

I have to say it was really exhausting trying to follow them in the Rosemary, never at any one flower more than a half a second.

{Stock}

And then thankfully she chose this pretty pink flower. I definitely noticed there are some flowers they go to that make them much easier to photograph than others and Stock seems to be one of them. Their flight pattern isn't nearly as erratic as with the Rosemary.

{Stock}

Have you ever paid much attention to the blob they carry on their hind legs? No? Well. . . they have special pollen baskets on their hind legs that have many hairs so that when they gather the pollen and after mixing in a little bee saliva, they can comb it through those hairs. In fact you can usually guess as to which flower they were visiting based on what color it is. {Look at the first photo again}

{Stock}

My submission to Photo Art Friday - theme Abstract - using only Bonnie's textures. I started with a tulip photo I painted with my lens so the photo was already somewhat abstract. Then I added the textures dropped egg, art smoke, no rules, aged text and vintage vellum. I have to admit, I'm enjoying abstract photo art more and more, but it does take thinking outside the box for me.

I have to say I had the best time watching the bees in the Camellias. But I'm going to have to go back to get better photos since I wasn't as pleased with how those turned out. The bee completely disappears into the middle of the flowers stamens and there were too many deep shadows to get a lot of detail. So, you know what that means .  . . there will be more bee shots and more bee trivia! ;)

Hope you have a bee[autiful] weekend!
Love, Kim
XO

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Friday Photo Journal, Finding Serendipity [1440]

Free and easy . . . Texture Tuesday

{Kim Klassen Sybil, Edith and Violet textures}

"The temple bell stops but I still hear the sound coming out of the flowers."

- Basho

It seems the only place I've been able to get to lately is the nursery. But when you live on the gulf coast, in Texas, you have to click while the clicking is still good. Because before long it will be just too hot, for me AND for the poor flowers. And then, you will find me at the beach . . . searching the sea weed . . . oh I can't wait! Especially since I now have a casting net. Oh the fun things I will find!!

You all know I love water drops, but a refracted water drop is the cats meow! I really had to hold my breath to get this one...as I was hand holding the camera. 

And one more of one of my favorites to photograph right now, the Osteospermum or African Daisy. I've never grown these, I think it may just get too hot in the summer for them, but they sure are a happy little flower!

And now I really need to stop playing and go clean some stuff. We were gone all weekend out of town and when we walked in the door it looked like someone partied like it was 1999 . . . well, okay I guess it was like that when we left. 

Have a fabulous Tuesday friends!

P.S. - I'm over at Focusing on Life, my collaborative blog, talking about random acts of kindness and how it has the power to impact someones day. I would love for you to come share a random act of kindness you did, or received . . . 

Love, Kim

XO

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Photo-heart connection, number 2

"We have to believe that even the briefest of human connections can heal.

Otherwise, life is unbearable."

- Joss Whedon

I actually started out this morning thinking I had already chosen my photo, but as I was looking for something else, and as I came across this photo from last weekend again, it tugged a little lot harder.

It could be that these girls from my kids high school won the 5A Division III Basketball Championship and are now state bound, playing today, for the chance to play for the state title tomorrow night.  

But really, it's so much more. It's the way they have their arms around each other that just says, we aren't just a group of girls on a team, but we are connected to one another, and we care about each other. Some of them may graduate this year and will go their own way, but the connections that they've made even though they may be brief, mean something, and they will take that with them along the rest of their journey.

Now at 50, I've made many connections on my journey in life, some that have been by choice, and some that have not, and many that were just not long enough. But those connections, all strung together, the good, the bad and the ugly, have to mean something . . . and not just to us, but to the person on the other end of that connection too. 

That quote just rings so true to me, and I'm reminded of the many brief connections, some just fleeting moments in time really, of encounters with strangers who have touched my heart at the very moment it was needed most. But I'm also reminded most of all, that unless I pay attention I may not be the connection that someone else needs when they need it most either.

Love, Kim

XO

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